 |
The original article ‘Ischa is erotisch masseuse en gaat naar swingersclubs’ from the October 2026 issue of the Dutch magazine LINDA. can be read here. The translated text of the article is written out below.
Ischa is an erotic masseuse and visits swinger clubs
After a relationship with barely any sex, 45-year-old Ischa* decides to see a gigolo. Up until then, her ex had been her only sexual partner. “I just really wanted to know what it’s like to sleep with someone else.”
Ischa enjoys the experience so much that she starts seeing him more often. And it doesn’t stop at just one gigolo; she starts exploring others too. A whole new world opens up for her—from sex saunas and swinger clubs to erotic massages. She shares her full story with LINDA..
Ischa’s story is part of the LINDA. dossier ‘LIEFDESVORMEN’. You can find all the articles from this feature right here:
FIRST TIME WITH A GIGOLO
Ischa clearly remembers her first date with a gigolo. “For my first time sleeping with someone else, I wanted to play it as safe as possible instead of just picking some random guy off the street. So I started looking for a gigolo online. One guy really caught my eye.”
She meets up with him at a hotel to break the ice. “We grabbed a drink and just talked for a bit, just to see if we had a vibe. We ended up locking in another date for that exact same week.”
MORE DATES TO COME
Ischa is pretty nervous before their second date. But as it turns out, she has absolutely nothing to worry about. “He knew he was the first guy after my ex-husband. I didn’t have great experiences with sex when I was younger, which made meeting up with someone else extra terrifying. He knew about that too, which really helped put me at ease.”
“We started off slow. After talking for a bit, he gave me a massage, and things just naturally took off from there. It was amazing—a completely different world compared to what I was used to with my ex. In the final years of our marriage, we didn’t even do it anymore; we slept in separate rooms. There was zero intimacy or warmth. And when we did do it, I didn’t even really enjoy it.”
It doesn’t stop at just two dates. She keeps seeing him. “And other gigolos too. Every single time was different, which made it so exciting. But I always found myself going back to ‘my’ first gigolo.”
Gigolos usually cost a fortune. But Ischa knows you don’t always have to break the bank. “He charged €300 for three hours. He deliberately keeps his prices low because he specializes in helping women with vaginismus and sexual difficulties, and he wants his services to be accessible to everyone.”
GOING TO A SEX SAUNA
After a few dates, he suggests going to a sex sauna. “That was the start of so much more,” Ischa laughs. “We shared this fantasy of what it would be like to have sex with multiple guys at the same time in the sauna. But the first time we walked in, I was completely overwhelmed by all those men. We ended up slipping away to a quieter spot just the two of us. We did invite one other guy to join us, though. It was so cool to experience this in a totally different setting. This gigolo really opened me up sexually. It gave me a huge confidence boost and helped me so much psychologically and personally.”
After the sex sauna, Ischa is curious to see what else is out there to explore. “I joined SDC, a dating site for swingers. I made some great connections there, and with a few of those guys, I continued on my journey of self-discovery.”
SWINGER CLUBS AND PARTIES
That’s how she gets to know the world of swinger clubs. She describes what it’s actually like inside. “It’s mostly couples who go there. First you connect, chat at the bar, or just lounge somewhere. You’ll naturally get a vibe if they’re into it too. You can also just lie down somewhere by yourself, and the guys will usually come up to you,” Ischa laughs.
She shares one memory that really stuck with her. “I went to a swinger party all by myself. I ended up surrounding myself with three super young guys—I think they were at least twenty years younger than me. We had a foursome right in the middle of the party. So there I was, having a gangbang with three young guys, getting pampered from every angle. It was amazing.”
EROTIC MASSAGES
Ischa also gets curious about nudist beaches. For two summers straight, she goes there as often as possible. That’s where she accidentally discovers a new passion. “I started putting sunscreen on men. I enjoyed it so much that I decided to dive deeper into massaging. That’s how I started working as an erotic masseuse, doing it two or three times a week for a long time.”
“As a masseuse, you’re the one who decides how far things go. My boundary is no penetration,” she shares. “I don’t kiss, and I blow them occasionally. They’re allowed to touch around the area of my G-string, though.”
NEW LOVE
During one massage session, she feels a special spark with a client. “We met up casually afterwards, so not for money. It was so much fun; we just couldn’t stop talking. We ended up in a relationship, and now we actually give erotic massages together.”
Sexually, Ischa and her boyfriend are completely on the same page. “We have a rule that we only have sex with someone else if money is involved. Money serves a purpose; it creates a boundary with the person you’re intimate with. For example, we don’t go to sex clubs solo anymore—we only go together. If there’s no money involved, it’s just the two of us.”
SEX WITH VULNERABLE PEOPLE
Because of an upcoming move, Ischa and her boyfriend will soon stop giving joint massages. “I’m going to miss it so much, so I’ve joined several foundations as a sex worker for people with disabilities. I’m a certified healthcare assistant by profession, so now I can combine the two. The only new thing is that I’ll be having penetrative sex for money, and that these clients are more vulnerable in life.”
The idea of doing this work had been on Ischa’s mind for a while. “I first heard about these organizations during my training to become a healthcare assistant. It always stayed in the back of my mind. I talked it over with my boyfriend, and he also thinks it’s a great fit for me.” Right after her interview with LINDA., Ischa has her very first appointment. “I’m visiting a 75-year-old man with dementia. It’s exciting, but I’m looking forward to it. Just going to see what he wants.”
TALKING ABOUT SEXUALITY
Ischa believes it’s crucial to talk openly about sexual needs. “By being vulnerable and opening up to someone about your desires, you can become a completely different person. That’s exactly what I love about what I’m going to do as a sex worker in the healthcare sector.”
For readers who are curious about exploring their sexuality, Ischa has some advice. “Do whatever makes you feel safe and comfortable. Don’t just dive straight into a sex club; start small. It’s a journey of discovery. And take good care of yourself. At one point, I was so active that I went a bit overboard, and my boyfriend had to step in. It’s important to stay mindful. At the end of the day, you’re still just a woman—not a sex monster.”
*Ischa is sharing her story anonymously. Her real name is known to the editors.